STATUS OPERATION PAINTING LITTLE SISTER'S ROOM: BLOGGING/BORED BREAK.
i haven't blogged in forever! i've been on tumblr, since all of my friends have "switched," as you say, and i just really cannot forget this artsy, fartsy space on the internet, aka my blogspot. it's been with me since, like, sixth grade!

i'm not really sure what to say, because i'm not sure who actually reads this and who doesn't (comments would be greatly appreciated, so i could get a general idea ;D) but i guess i'll just catch up on my own life, since it's summer, ie. slow-down time.

i set two goals for myself this summer:
1) perfect nocturne et allegro scherzando (up to tempo and everything, so much flute playing D:)
2) get healthier.

i don't think i'm always that vague, but...so far, it's been going slowly. summer is pretty slow, don't you think? so i have been doing some other things, like learning piano and rereading some harry potter, listening to cool new music, and painting my toenails. oh yeah, and painting my sister's room. because i promised my mom i would help my sister, because she's working, and my sister is morally opposed to labor. as am i, but i put on weird indie music that rachel probably doesn't understand. HAHA.

i've been praying more lately, too. there are nights i just cry myself to sleep because all i freaking want are answers from God. what did You put me here for. if being gay is a sin, why did You create homosexuals. why do some Christians believe other things than i do and believe they're as correct as i think are my beliefs. or any doctrine, for that matter.

who knows.

i just don't like the thought that my only option is to ask humans these questions. if i believe in anything, i believe humans are incomplete. no matter how religious or spiritual you are, the search for self-identity is lifelong.

i've been humming sufjan's "for the widows in paradise, for the fatherless in ypsilanti" for a while now. there's a line that gets me everytime:

"I'll do anything for you."
thanks, God, for never being too far away.