i am just numb. numb all over.

i came into the day rejuvenated and stimulated for a full day of honor band and a party afterwards.

i come out of the day wanting to melt with god-awful embarrassment and grief.

everything i had hoped for was deflated with a fantastically-quick whoosh, and now i realize that all i need is music and God. they've never let me down, but people do, because you put stupid, stupid hope in them.

God, just get me out of here.